Adoption & Foster Care Family

Being Adopted

A guest post from Heather Hope:

Being adopted wasn’t easy. In fact, it was one of the most difficult decisions I’ve ever had to make at the young age of 11.

Growing up, my mom and dad always did drugs and used their money on drugs and alcohol instead of taking care of me and my sister. I remember going to church one night and coming home to my dad abusing my mom. She was pinned to the bed and all i saw was his fists balled up and smashing her face. I was a mama’s girl, so I instantly started screaming and that resulted in me being slammed up against the wall by my dad.

Not long after, I was taken from my parents and sent to a group home, where they would protect me and provide a home. Throughout the years that i was in foster care, I was with about eight different families – that I can remember. They all wanted to adopt me but, every time, I refused. I thought they were just trying to take the place of my birth family.

Finally, my case worker told me that i HAD to be adopted. That my parents couldn’t get me back or even see me at that. I was filled with guilt and fear. I felt guilty and started to feel like it was my fault they were fighting. I don’t know why I thought it was my fault, but like most foster kids, they think that it all happened because of them. I felt scared because I was no longer allowed to see my mom or my dad. I was rejected. I felt worthless.

As part of the adoption, my case worker put my picture on a website called My Turn Now. It listed all my interests, and some important information. Soon after that, I was told by the director of the group home that I had a meeting with a family that wanted to adopt me. I came home from school, and walked quickly past the counseling office. When I passed, I saw a blondish-red headed lady, and a bald man. I ran to my room because I knew they were there to see me. The director came in my room and said i was wanted in the office.

The family told me that they wanted me and that i was special. It made me feel loved and even cracked a smile when they told me I might get a cell phone. They took me on a couple of trips to get to know them, the trips were amazing! Finally, i moved in. I wasn’t adopted yet and I started to act up because that was how I knew they wouldn’t want me. I wanted to make sure that they were in this for the long run.

But they didn’t quit. Instead of giving up on me like a couple of the other families, they coached me through a lot of the situations. I then got adopted and since then, it’s been a growing process. I love my family and glad that i was placed with this family. They have helped me in many areas and continue to help me. They love me unconditionally and they express their love everyday. They work hard to provide for five daughters. They love us and care for us.

Being adopted, was a hard decision but it was worth it. I have met some pretty amazing people that influence me and keep me accountable to be who God has called me to be. I glad that God can do great things in peoples’ lives.
I love you mom & dad !! <3

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