In Part One and Part Two of this three part series we explored the issue of difficulty and pain in our lives and the all too common question, “God, if you love me so much, why would you let this happen to me?” If you haven’t read Part One and Part Two I encourage you to read them both as an introduction to the next part of our journey. So, without further ado, let’s find out what we can do when our lives take unexpected turns into difficult and painful waters.

Now that we know that, without question, we will experience difficulty and pain in our lives. What are we suppose to do with it? Honestly, this is the most difficult part, but the answer is this: we have to find joy in the midst of our heartache. James 1: 2-4 puts it best, “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” Yep, you read it right, we’re suppose to consider it a pure joy when we face trials of “many” kinds. Now, don’t get me wrong, I can assure you that in the many painful moments of my life I have never (repeat: never) described it as “joyful.” As a matter of fact, it sucks. Although, in every instance, I’ve wondered why, asked questions and wished with all my heart I did not have to go through it, I have always sensed the presence of God’s love in the midst of it. In that, I’ve always found comfort.

As I’ve experienced my life so far, I’ve discovered several critical elements to finding joy in the midst of my heartache and pain.

Worship - “I will give thanks to the Lord because of his righteousness and will sing praise to the name of the Lord Most High” (Psalm 7:17) I worship God because He is righteous and in His righteousness, He loves me beyond measure and has promised me that I would never endure anything that I couldn’t handle. This is a simple concept, but very difficult to walk out when you’re in pain. However, we must realize that our worship should never be connected to simple emotions. Some of the most powerful moments of worship come when we’re feeling least worshipful. In the midst of heartache and pain, we worship God because we know He holds us in the palm of His hands. We know that He hurts with us. We know that His tears are echoing ours and that He is cheering us on to press forward because He sees the rainbow that’s just outside the exit of our tunnel of pain. I promise you that worshiping in the midst of your pain will be hard because in our humanness we can find it incredibly difficult to see beyond our immediate circumstances – but I can also promise you that it’s essential, worth it and it will, beyond a shadow of a doubt, give you the strength to push through.

Contentment – “I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need.” (Phil. 4:12) I love this scripture because it’s the epitome of contentment. Paul is saying that he has found the ability to be content, no matter what his life circumstances; whether rich or poor, in abundance or in need. To be content is to be in a state of well-being. I’m reminded of the old hymn, It is Well With My Soul… the veracity of its words echo through my heart in many difficult times… “When peace, like a river, attendeth my way, when sorrows like sea billows roll; whatever my lot, thou has taught me to say, it is well, it is well, with my soul.” At the center of this type of “well-being” in the midst of our pain is peace. Understanding that God’s presence in our lives brings peace, no matter the turbulence of our current waters, the peace of God is there to keep us steady and strong. Phil. 4:7 puts it best, “And the peace of God which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds through Christ Jesus.” God’s peace isn’t something that we can understand, ever. But it does it’s greatest work in protecting our hearts and minds from the onslaught of the enemy during our deepest, darkest struggles. To sum it up, being content in the midst of your pain is simply about trusting God, taking a deep breath and leaning on His strong arms so that He can give you a peace that passes all understanding and a sense of complete well-being, even as you shed tears of sorrow and pain.

Courage – I love the quote, “Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.” by Ambrose Redmoon. I don’t know how often I’ve had to remind myself of that. To be courageous in the midst of difficulty and pain isn’t to ignore it, or brush aside the fear of what’s happening. Quite to the contrary, it’s to face it, to recognize it and to deal with it at face value. The bottom line is that when we’re hurting it’s scary. No, I’m not saying to give into your fear or live in it. 1 Timothy 1:7 is very clear that God doesn’t give us a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power and love and a sound mind. It’s our ability to understand that we have the Spirit of God within us who empowers us with His love and with His understanding that gives us the ability to walk through our fears and into His peace. As sons and daughters of God, we can have courage because we understand that, no matter our circumstance, it’s going to work out for our benefit. My favorite scripture in the bible and the one that I lean on whenever I’m afraid is Jer. 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you says the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” Understanding that courage isn’t the absence of fear, but rather the knowledge that God’s purposes and plans in your life are more important than your fear is a huge step toward healing in the midst of your pain.

Expectancy – In the midst of our difficulty it is very hard to look up and anticipate that good things are going to come from it, but we have to remember that God is our eternal comfort, Father and friend. His desire for us is always that we grow into His purposes and plans in our lives and those are always for our benefit and good – though we can’t always see it. I love the scripture in Isaiah, 61:3, “To console those who mourn in Zion, to give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they may be called trees of righteousness.” This scripture is a clear promise to us that God will turn our pain into joy. I can’t tell you how many times God has reminded me of this scripture as I’ve comforted others in their pain by revisiting the faithful God I’ve come to know in my own situations. As I retell my story to someone else to say, ‘I know what you’re going through’ and watch as their trembling turns to peace and their tears begin to flow with understanding, I’m always reminded that serving others is the ultimate form of beauty and in this way, I understand that God is giving me beauty for the ashes of my grief and mourning. It is in this way that I continue to expect that God will turn my mourning into joy.

I ran across a poem by Margaret Snell Nicholson who was a woman who suffered from four incurable diseases. She struggled with pain more than thirty-five years, an invalid, bound to her bed. Her spirit was so transcendently triumphant through those many weary years, that she wrote some of the finest Christian poetry which has ever been written. (to view more of her poems, click here. Sadly most of her books are now out of print. I found this poem to be extremely relevant to our current topic:

Treasures

One by one He took them from me,
All the things I valued most,
Until I was empty-handed;
Every glittering toy was lost.

And I walked earth’s highways, grieving.
In my rags and poverty.
Till I heard His voice inviting,
“Lift your empty hands to Me!

So I held my hands toward heaven,
And He filled them with a store
Of His own transcendent riches,
Till they could contain no more.

And at last I comprehended
With my stupid mind and dull,
That God could not pour His riches
Into hands already full!

-Martha Snell Nicholson

As I finish the writing of this, my heart is grieving for the tragic loss of Maria Chapman, adopted and youngest daughter of Steven and Mary Beth Chapman. It has been a little more than a week since the tragic accident that took her life. I can’t imagine the unspeakable agony that this whole family must be feeling. Please pray that God’s love would wrap them in peace and comfort.

May God’s richest blessings be yours and may you always find Him to be your eternal comfort whether rich or poor, in abundance or in need. Thank you for reading.

Walking in His peace,